~ The Twelve Tweets of Christmas ~
By Angela Clarke
On the first day of Christmas
my true love tweeted me:
An Instagram of a fairy-lit Tree
On the second day of Christmas
my true love tweeted me:
Two Avocados on Toast
and an Instagram of a fairy-lit Tree
On the third day of Christmas
my true love tweeted me:
Three Sentimental Ads
Two Avocados on Toast
and an Instagram of a fairy-lit Tree
On the fourth day of Christmas
my true love tweeted me:
Four Festive Hashtags
Three Sentimental Ads
Two Avocados on Toast
and an Instagram of a fairy-lit Tree
On the fifth day of Christmas
my true love tweeted me:
Five Gingerbread Lattes
Four Festive Hashtags
Three Sentimental Ads
Two Avocados on Toast
and an Instagram of a fairy-lit Tree
On the sixth day of Christmas
my true love tweeted me:
Six Santa Emojis Grinning
Five Gingerbread Lattes
Four Festive Hashtags
Three Sentimental Ads
Two Avocados on Toast
and an Instagram of a fairy-lit Tree
On the seventh day of Christmas
my true love tweeted me:
Seven Selfies a Pouting
Six Santa Emojis Grinning
Five Gingerbread Lattes
Four Festive Hashtags
Three Sentimental Ads
Two Avocados on Toast
and an Instagram of a fairy-lit Tree
On the eighth day of Christmas
my true love tweeted me:
Eight Cat Memes Mewing
Seven Selfies a Pouting
Six Santa Emojis Grinning
Five Gingerbread Lattes
Four Festive Hashtags
Three Sentimental Ads
Two Avocados on Toast
and an Instagram of a fairy-lit Tree
On the ninth day of Christmas
my true love tweeted me:
Nine Novelty Jumpers Itching
Eight Cat Memes Mewing
Seven Selfies a Pouting
Six Santa Emojis Grinning
Five Gingerbread Lattes
Four Festive Hashtags
Three Sentimental Ads
Two Avocados on Toast
and an Instagram of a fairy-lit Tree
On the tenth day of Christmas
my true love tweeted me:
Ten Cocktails Clinking
Nine Novelty Jumpers Itching
Eight Cat Memes Mewing
Seven Selfies a Pouting
Six Santa Emojis Grinning
Five Gingerbread Lattes
Four Festive Hastags
Three Sentimental Ads
Two Avocados on Toast
and an Instagram of a fairy-lit Tree
On the tenth day of Christmas
my true love tweeted me:
Ten Cocktails Clinking
Nine Novelty Jumpers Itching
Eight Cat Memes Mewing
Seven Selfies a Pouting
Six Santa Emojis Grinning
Five Gingerbread Lattes
Four Festive Hastags
Three Sentimental Ads
Two Avocados on Toast
and an Instagram of a fairy-lit Tree
On the eleventh day of Christmas
my true love tweeted to me:
Eleven Hangovers #Hanging
Ten Cocktails Clinking
Nine Novelty Jumpers Itching
Eight Cat Memes Mewing
Seven Selfies a Pouting
Six Santa Emojis Grinning
Five Gingerbread Lattes
Four Festive Hashtags
Three Sentimental Ads
Two Avocados on Toast
and an Instagram of a fairy-lit Tree
On the twelfth day of Christmas
my true love tweeted me:
Twelve Viral Vines
Eleven Hangovers #Hanging
Ten Cocktails Clinking
Nine Novelty Jumpers Itching
Eight Cat Memes Mewing
Seven Selfies a Pouting
Six Santa Emojis Grinning
Five Gingerbread Lattes
Four Festive Hashtags
Three Sentimental Ads
Two Avocados on Toast
and an Instagram of a fairy-lit Tree
Have a Very Merry Christmas (Online)! xx
(Photo credit to Tim Wheeler)
Angela Clarke is an author,
columnist and playwright. Her debut crime thriller Follow Me is out in e-book 3rd December, and in
paperback 31st December 2015.
You can find Angela Clarke on Facebook | Twitter | angelaclarke.co.uk
I loved this! Merry Christmas :)
ReplyDeleteVery clever
ReplyDeleteLove it!
ReplyDeleteOh my goodness, this is the most absurd and darling little poem <3 You know, I never stopped to think about it, but maybe I love fairytale retelling novels for a similar reason as I love parody songs. It is just NEAT to take something so traditional and see it re-imagined in a way that is only compressible to someone living through this century :)
ReplyDeleteI missed your blog so much while I was NaNoWriMo-ing last month...so happy to have time to catch up with everything now!